Tuesday, December 28, 2010

ls -s ... really ?


  On December 8th, I told you something about somebody's ls -s. I called it a "red letter day." Now I have come to think of it otherwise. Was it really a red-letter day ? Did the red-letter day arrive sooner than expected ? were everyone involved completely read for it ? I just don't know ! I hope it's figured out soon.

+ Chetu

finally married ... well, almost

   Sometime in 2002, I remember that me, you, and Preetu met up at your place to study for Math internals. Preetu stopped studying after one worked example, you followed and I stopped after four or five. Preetu's exact words were: "eno idu! nodkondre saaku enu thale use madodu bekilla." We went for a casual walk later on around Isro layout. We went to Devara kere and sat down speaking kashta sukha. Initial trash talk led to some serious things and soon you guys were talking serious stuff like preetu and vidya, you and you-know-who. Well, I remember only so much coz ... like a dumb-arse I thought the talk was boring and went on a walk around the lake!! Anyway, coming back to the point of this blog, - 8 years later Preetu's life has finally settled. I can confidently say it is "ls -s" for Preetu. Vidya told me that her wedding is fixed and to be held in Feb 2011. I didn't feel happy n stuff ... instead I was relieved. How much that poor soul has been through! I told her ... soon after you get married, on your car you put up a sign "Finally married!!" anta.
   Good things happening in namm boyz lives. Wish you were here to see all this. I think you have a huge role to play in their relationship. How much you stood and bucked Preetu up when he said "ashte maga, we're over." My god! I still remember the looooong talk session we had that night in GanapatipuLe beach. No matter what Preetu said, you (and Vidya) always knew he cannot live without her. That's a gift few have moms ... understanding a person so much that you'll know what's best for them even if they don't. Anyway ... this blog was about Preetu and Vidya's ls -s ... so i'll keep my thoughts off it. That's it moms ... I've nothing else to say right now ... although I have a lot in many other contexts especially my visit to Cali. Will write to you after I gather my thoughts.
love you moms,

Saturday, December 11, 2010

I hate weekends!!!


  Yepp. its official. This is the worst weekend ever! - so far. I have a nasty course to study, head's all heated up, and every time I call I hear the female voice from AT&T and Vodafone ... say what she says. I hate watching movies on the laptop ... I hate watching sitcoms alone ... but I am doing all that. Is it so dam hard to have a proper day! I hate this situation ... bloody hell ... what ever did I do wrong!

+ Chetan

Being the best-man: gift or curse ?

   "Ladies, Gentlemen may I have your attention please." He said standing up to a set of people neatly dressed up and seated in their designated seats around the dinner table. The best man of the groom placed the glass of orange-juice (this guy is a tee-totaler) on the table and went on to say, "I have known these two love birds since college. Anything said about their love will fall short to describe the perfection that they are - together. Comparisons become useless, and hence I'll be brief and let's give a big round of applause for Mr. and Mrs. Perfect." He clapped his hands and initiated an applause that came from every table. The bride and groom looked at the best man and smiled. He sat down and got back to his orange juice while the band announced that it was time for the first dance. Space in the middle was cleared and the bride and groom danced to the soft tunes of Eagles ballads.
  While everyone was being about, chatting, greeting and generally sticking to the typical ceremonial behavior... there was this one person who was lost in retrospection. He just stood there in the corner and looked at the couple dance. One could clearly tell that he was completely lost in retrospect by looking at his face. He was not even trying to hide it! This blog is the story of what a best friend goes through ... especially if he is best friends with both the bride and groom. This blog (or series of blogs) looks to bring out the predicaments and the feeling of detachment a person feels when his best friends enter into a relationship.
  Awesome threesome that they were ... always spent time together. Even when they were geographically apart, they spent time together. Thanks to technology ... it was possible. The best-man smiled when he recalled the really long voice conferences the the three of em had. Those voice conferences didn't have a stipulated end time. They used to end on one weekend, only to begin on a second weekend - right where it was left off. The best-man's room mate kept track of the time span of these voice conferences and was amazed to see the talking capacity of people. This went on for a few weeks... and then suddenly he was told that the other two had decided to become a couple. "what ? how ? when ? i mean ... where ??" These were his initial reactions. He was so happy ... and confused at the same time. Happy because now, there is nothing that can separate him with his friends. Confused because he had no clue about what was going on. He needed sometime to sink it in and hence just expressed the happiness part of it and burried the confusion deep within him. 

  "ring... ring... Hello! (voice on phone) hieeee! ... what u upto ? (voice on phone) talking to him ;) oh ... (giggles) you two have a nice time chatting :) say hello to him from myside (voice on phone) okee will do. I'll call once I am done." The call almost never came. Initial days were when the best-man knew the couple needed time for each other and didn't bother about the non-returned calls. When the callback did come, it came with a lot of exciting events and things to share. The best-man felt so happy that he was part of something so special. After hanging up the phone, he went for a long walk and couldn't help thinking about the great times they're supposedly going to have in the not so near and uncertain future. Little did he know, destiny always has other plans.
  It was one of those days for the best-man... a really bad day. He felt really down and wanted to talk about it to his friends. "ring... ring... ring... ring... The person you called is not available at this moment. Please leave a message after the tone." "Hi! its me. Wat a crappy day... called you just like that. Call me back if possible. Bye." The call never came. He called again only to speak to the voice-mail woman yet another time. After a few attempts he gave up and thought his friends will call back. The call did come later that evening ... but by the time he could speak up and explain himself he learned that on the other side his friend is in a deep tone. Trouble! What the trouble was is irrelevant in this perspective. What's important is that the best-man swallowed his bad feeling, heard up and made his friend feel better. This is the first of many more such instances that a best-man has to go through. Everyone said that the best-man is the most understanding person ever. Some even go ahead and call it a trait or a boon. I say that it is a curse. It is a curse upon oneself to understand others to such an extent that no reaction to lack of reciprocity is assumed. An understanding person is always there... for his buddies. But are the buddies there for the understanding person ? Reciprocity doesn't have to be materialistic. It just has to be a thing or two shared or most of the time being there. 

  The rest of this story is an open question. Is it not right on the part of a person who is understanding to expect to be reciprocated ? Can this feeling of "he'll understand, he'll be there ... it's okay" be called as taking the best-man for granted ? Is it the best-man's mistake that he did not communicate his "left out" feeling with the couple ? or is it the couple's mistake that they didn't think the best-man would ever feel left out ? Why should the best-man feel lonely even when he is around the most important people in his life ? Why is it that when a new relationship starts, the existing ones take a beating ? Why is it that some times the closest people are completely oblivious to an obvious feeling which is otherwise quite visible to the uninitiated ? It is a gift for only few people that balance relationships well.  If one happens to ask them how they do it - you'd get a response that "I am not balancing anything here. I speak out everything that I ever think of to every speacial person in my life. And I want to hear from my special ones too. If they don't speak out, I claw my way into them and try to make them feel better." If you ever have known such a person ... you hold on to them real tight - for such a thing is one of a kind.
 - chetu

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

ls -s

   I am happy! so happy. Something good happening in friends lives. But again... this just had to happen. What goes down has to rise up - and rise it did! I guess I haven't sunk in the feeling completely hence I am at a loss of words to describe it to you but You can see it, right moms ?? Its been taken care of. The reason you came back... the reason for your smiles... is now in good hands. Someone said "a traveller looks all over the place only to find what he was looking for back home." Applying this ... what was being searched for is now found amongst us. Thanks to a few amazing people and the courage within... there are smiles awaiting. The question is ... is it here ? or miles away ? I know what this event means to me in the future... but still I am happy. The effort and thought paid off. Record this day moms! It is a red letter day (amongst others) in all our lives.

- chetu